Pay No Mind to the Demons….

… they fill you with fear.

Last night Phillip Phillips was crowned  the winner of American Idol season 11. It was an awesome moment to watch, as he is super talented and yet humble, and remained that way through his entire Idol journey. It was inspiring to watch him and great for my sons to see someone who accomplished a dream by staying true to himself. Throughout the season, Phillip paid no mind to the Hollywood “experts” who told him how to dress, how to play and sing, and how to act. He continued to focus on what he loved about it all – the music – and didn’t get caught up in all the extra noise.

Not to mention, the first thing he did after winning was run to his family and hug them. If I can raise sons like that, I’ll be happy.

The lessons my boys learned from watching Phillip Phillips? Yes, okay – rock stars are cool – but also: humility, grace, positive attitude, hard work, appreciate the moment at hand, and humbleness. And, pay no mind to your naysayers – they only fill you with fear. Listen to yourself and you’ll be golden.

Phillip Phillips wins American Idol: sings, cries and appreciates the moment

What Makes You Passionately Curious?

I read this quote twice yesterday and sometimes you feel like a message is just speaking to you when you keep running into it:

I have no special talents, I am just passionately curious. – Albert Einstein

Often when we reach certain points in our life, we wake up to what our passions are and choose to follow them more than we may have in the past. It isn’t easy balancing our interests with life’s necessities of paying the bills, sending the kids to college and otherwise working for a living. But start to think more about what excites you – what gets you up in the morning and makes you truly happy to be living?

Now ask yourself, how can I begin to incorporate that passion into my every day life? You might start small – for example, through a hobby once a week. But keep at it and eventually that passion will lead you down roads that you might not currently know exist. When you are passionate about what you are doing, you’re happy. And when you’re happy, success follows.

Find your passion, trust in it and follow it. You’ll never regret it.

Mother’s Day: Having a Mom, Being a Mom

Happy Mother’s Day! I didn’t want to write something political or overly dramatic, too feminist or sappy. But I did want to lament on the best things I’ve learned about having a Mom and being a Mom.

Thank you to my Mom, Robin, for the many great lessons she’s taught me in 41 years of life. I’m still learning – because she’s still learning! Some lessons were taught on purpose and some – maybe the most poignant – were inadvertently taught through her own life experiences. Sometimes you don’t learn these types of things until you’re older and you look back with a more understanding viewpoint. It’s why this is one of my favorite quotes:

“When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.” (Attributed by Reader’s Digest, Sept. 1937)

Some of the greatest things my Mother has taught me include:

- Always try new things (Like last summer when she, at the age of 65 and after double hip surgeries, got up on my standup paddle board!)

- Food is good (I’m so grateful I had a beautiful mother who, by the grace of her own interests, taught me the opposite of what all those beauty magazines and ads shove down girls’ throats)

- Sometimes you just have to put yourself first, even when it’s uncomfortable. And it’s OK. (This is one of those inadvertent lessons…)

- Don’t judge others, just accept them. We are all on our own paths.

 

Thanks Mom!

On the flip side, and it bears repeating, being a mother has also taught me a lot. And I know I have many more lessons coming. But some of the best things my sons have taught me are:

- Patience beyond what I previously understood to be patience

- Humor (Lighten up, Mom!)

- Live in the moment (I know, I’ve said it before but it is so true – the moment passes and you can’t get it back)

- Teamwork (Yes, okay, I knew this one – but the past year, as we adjusted to a new family dynamic, we’ve become quite a team)

- Sometimes, you’ve just got to eat a donut.

Thanks to my Mom and my boys for making Mother’s Day special for me. I hope if you’re a mother, that today reminds you of how blessed you are to have that life experience. It is an ongoing lesson in itself, if you’re willing to recognize it as such.

10 Things my 10-Year-Old has Taught Me in 10 Years

Today my first born turns 10. The big 1-0, double digits, serious stuff. And while he’s feeling pretty darn proud and excited, I am too – among feelings of disbelief that a decade has already passed.

I remember clearly the feelings of excitement, anxiety, happiness and fear that came with finding out we were having a baby. A baby! I wasn’t sure I was ready – but it’s one of those life experiences, at least for me, that you just have to dive into – I’d never be ready if I kept thinking about it too much. I was never one of those parents that just knew they wanted to have children. I just figured if it was meant to happen it would, and if not, it wouldn’t. (Easy to say when it happens easily – I have a lot of friends who struggled for years to have children and I have all the respect in the world for the heartache those years brought to them.)

It did happen, and I’m so grateful. Not just for this amazing human that’s in my life every day, but in the things he’s taught me and blessed my life with. They say we’re teaching our children every day, which is true – but they also teach us every day – for those who are willing to listen to the lessons. Profound lessons in little packages. Here are 10 interesting lessons my 10-year-old has taught me in the last 10 years. Happy Birthday, Richie. I love you.

  1. Love is the best gift you can give. No amount of Legos, video games or cool trips can top just sitting on the couch together every night.
  2. When there’s a screen on, creativity is off. I’m not a crazy, no-videos-no-TV Mom by any stretch, but I have learned that when our brains are auto-stimulated by someone else’s story all of the time, we don’t spend much time creating our own. Turning off the TV, iPods, video consoles is a big part of keeping kids creative and thinking.
  3. But there are lessons in everything, even the TV. No, not the Lifetime movie kind of lesson, but interest in how things work – like how movies are made, which leads to using tech to create our own, which leads to a lot of laughs.
  4. Speaking of laughs, do it more often. Parenting has taught me to lighten up and try to find the humor in any situation.
  5. Sometimes, cleaning up [or work] can wait. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve said, “Yep, in a minute, right after I [fill in the blank]” only to have missed a moment that I can’t get back.
  6. Don’t just hear, listenIf your son or daughter wants to show you a new trick, dance move or creation – pay attention. How many times have you “uh-huh”‘d them to death while not really listening? I know I want my sons to talk to me openly – as openly as possible – when they get into their teen years, and that setting the stage now means showing them I’m truly listening to what they want to tell me.
  7. Kids deserve the opportunity to express an opinion. Too often we don’t let children say their piece. We’re the parent, we’re the ones who set the rules, they just need to quiet down and listen. Not true. Giving children a voice to express not only how they’re feeling, but how they view the world, is crucial to staying connected with them and helping them to turn into confident young men and women who will lead, not just follow.
  8. Movie nights are made for popcorn. You might have thought it was the other way around. Nope.
  9. Rising early really is nice. I’m a night owl, he’s a morning lark. Which means I used to be a night owl.
  10. A quiet moment can speak volumes. When is the last time you took a walk with your child and just talked? No entertainment, no phones, no iPods. Just you, your child, and the conversation that you’ll be amazed at as it develops. Try it – but don’t forget to listen.
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